Thursday, January 10, 2008

I Have Now Exhausted My Design Skills

...and it took nearly no time at all. Wait, who am I kidding? It took SO much time, time I should be doing laundry, cleaning my floors, making meals, going to the library. But I was determined. I had to try again. How is it that there are so many wonderwomen out there who have great beautiful terrific blog graphics and design while mine languished in the Novice zone?

Well, I DID BUY a graphic. For one buck! So tah-dah.... I learned how to superimpose writing over that. It only took me 3.047 days to learn THAT one skill, hahaha!

Even after all that, my new design is showing up grainy and blurred once published. Oh, the original is perfect and crisp and doesnt take up half the screen. But in the process of computer-speak, I have not mastered the art of communicating through kindergarten-level blog publishing means the SIMPLE and NICE presentation that could have been. I DID talk to the computer the whole time. I exhorted, wheedled, cajoled. I begged. And yet...well, and yet. I'm a relic, and I have relic skills.

Is this what it's come to? My web page design skills are the equivalent of my grandpa's skills with television reception so long ago. Every night we clustered near the blinking TV screen, snowy with white and gray scrolling glare, he'd go outside, rotate the antenna (muttering under his breath things my grandma would hear and hiss "not, in front of the girls, Wilbur!)and shout through the window "How's that? More to the right?" Then he'd position it as directed, make his way back inside, finally get settled in front of the old black and white set, until the next good gust of wind dislodged the antenna again.

"PSHAW!!!" (I swear he said that)

"Wilbur! Not in front of the girls..."

I couldn't tell today, you what an IPod is, how to work a Blackberry, can't figure what buttons to push on most of the fancier cellphones, never have trusted being able to NOT lose one of those hand-held digital organizers, don't know what an MP3 is or how to download one onto a CD, can't operate Excel, can't do a decent spreadsheet...and have no clue how to fancy up my blogger blog to look professional like many of the blogs I love. Where did I get off the train??

So this is it...it's the scissors and glue version. Is this my Progress ceiling? Am I one of those people who refuses to learn how to microwave popcorn because you have to push a button, or who won't learn how to check their voice mails because it's "technology?" Well, thankfully, I do know how to do those things (though we dont use microwaves any more). I guess I'm feeling less and less inclined to keep up. Maybe I prefer relics because what with all this planned obsolescence, it's just a matter of time before I'll have to relearn the Newer-Better-Faster.

At any rate, what I'm hoping to learn more of is not the new but the old...the ways things were done for generations, or sometimes thousands of years, before "progress" erased their memory.

But I made a weak stab at updating the graphic header on this blog, and it may not progress farther without the intervention of at least a 6th grader. This is like the day I learned to operate the Subtitles button on DVDs. It's almost as thrilling as the moment I plugged my new camera into the computer and it ACTUALLY loaded pictures!

I'll stop while I'm ahead. After all, I did realize when opening up the html for the blog and peeking around a bit, one wrong keystroke and the whole thing could blow up. Nothing has exploded yet, so I'm stopping before it gets downright dangerous. For a relatively smart person, I can't believe I'm so chicken hearted and behind the times. And I can't believe I'm so ok with that...ha!

OK, enough ramble. Let's see if this gets posted when I hit Publish.

You never know...
;-)

3 comments:

Anonymous said...

Hmmm, it looks okay to me! What else did you want to do with it?

tina f. said...

You and I are apparently on the same level! I've been trying to put a "badge" on my sidebar and even the smallest size gets a portion cut off, so I gave up for now. But I have learned how to play in the html, after having totally erased entire entries because I couldn't get it to work. Computers! It's a love/hate thing.

Robbyn said...

mommymommy...thank you! I'm ultimately wanting an entirely different template and don't like what the blogger choices are, and dont know how to do a custom one and fiddle with the html without blowing the posts to kingdom come and then not having the know-how to fix my own mistakes. I particularly love the professional looking format of your blog. Anytime I now put a graphic in my header, it comes out off center and blurred rather than crisp, though the original is very crisp and clean. I'd like to know how to make the headers where I can assemble a collage or series of my own photos, like many people do, or find really interesting graphics like Pioneer Woman has on her site (though I want mine to look completely different) or such as the header at Farmgirlfare. Not to copy, just to give an idea of what I'm looking for. I see great sites out there where people have personalized their blogs with really neat graphics, not just in a picture, but in the actual template itself (I guess that's how they show up) and where the format is a full page with sidebars. See? I'm having a hard time even describing what I want because I dont konw the right terms ;-)

Tina, I've tried things on the side bars that have been cut off, too. You're brave for tackling the html! I dont have time to try to fix anything I explode or erase. Looks like I need some courses...?? :)