Thursday, December 13, 2007

Surviving the Bah Humbugs

My own bah humbugs, that is :) Yes, I was tired, but also I just have times I get reflective/introspective and just want to step back and "process" things sometimes...and let the world keep spinning its own crazy spin...and be a spectator. Or maybe I really miss having four seasons and it seems strange to my body not to have any appreciably cold weather to sear the senses, clear the head, and make for bright cheeks and dashes indoors to bake goodies and curl under the warmth of an afghan on the couch. It's ten degrees or so cooler here than the summer weather, but still in the 80s. My plants and yard think it's one long summer. Since my garden was minimal this year, and laid to bed much earlier due to work schedules, I don't have lingering outdoor chores, but when we have it all underway in a bigger fashion in the not-too-distant future (for necessity rather than experimentation), will this season-that-won't-end prove exhausting? Strange, it seems unnatural to be hot ten months out of 12. The upside is the longer growing season, which I'm watching carefully, to see what planting times we'll need at what intervals throughout the year, since they're so different than four-season areas. We may need to plan a "salad season" if the weather ever gets below the 80s, in which to grow the lettuces and such and hopefully give the rest of the garden a sabbatical. Let's see...last year this time, we'd already had a couple of cold spells. Crazy crazy weather :)

I'm fighting some sort of keeps us busy in the details and my mind won't stop chipping away at questions and things I want to research here. I've seldom been here to blog in the last few weeks because of a reluctance to just ramble on, when most of the research is not anything I can put into practice in the now. It's not theoretical, I tell myself. We'll need to know something about many things, to have an idea, to avoid bigger blunders, to have something to start with and from which to fine tune. But I've been mostly reading others' blogs, and simply shutting up about it all for a bit. (Me, that is) Also, most of my writing comes off sounding like a complaint, which is strange since I daily feel grateful for nearly everything in my life.

I'm physically feeling much better...yay! And I'm not pregnant, which I wouldn't have minded (in fact, would have loved!), but which would have definately have put a different spin on some upcoming plans. School's going well for R, and J's job is more predictable than mine has been. Mine's been jammed with long hours, and with respites in between where there is no assignment at all...the schedule is unpredictable. And I've recognized a very important fact: I'm simply homesick. I love being home, working around this place, doing the stuff that needs to be done. It's my domain, where I feel comfortable, where I can be myself and dress the way that's comfortable and make a world for my family. I love feeling this way! I love taking care of my household and seeing my family happy here. It's our springboard to other places, too...but our place to come home to.

So, yes, I pulled myself from the doldrums and hurriedly pulled together a celebration night while there was still a day or two left of Hanukah, and we had a wonderful time together of lighting lights, having time together and talking, saying things we seldom stop and really talk about, and gift-giving. It was relaxed and fun, and everyone participated, and we ate pizza and laughed. There were not tons of gifts, but a few good ones, and mostly what we loved was just stopping and celebrating as a family...right here at home. And piecing together the beginning of what'll be our own tradition for this holiday. Yay! The menorah's still in the window, and the electric one will still be plugged in through the upcoming weeks...just because.

We're planning another trip to the more northerly counties to go look at the land, and have been on phone and emails with several contacts. While nothing has finished materializing, we're still in prayer and believe that ultimately what's meant to be WILL happen since we're being consistent and doing our part. God will help us with the timing and the open doors, and I do really believe that there is a "right place" He'll guide us towards. Thank you so much to those of you who're anticipating with us that day ...when it finally opens up and we start THAT new beginning phase!

I'll post a couple short posts about what I'm sniffing out just now about some native and non-native plants. J wants us to start gathering together some pots of tree seedlings. I'm not so sure we need to try to keep a bunch of seedlings growing in pots without having a place to plant them quickly...I'm concerned about keeping them healthy in pots in the meantime, but since he's so excited to try it, I'm aboard :)

OK, enough of this post. I'm already thinking of deleting! I'm boring myself to death!

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