Honey Oatmeal Loaves

Jack...

bought for me...

from craigslist...

a used, heavy duty...

 Kitchenaid stand mixer...

Don't count the slices that are missing from this loaf...ha!

HOOOOOO   RAAAYYYYYYYY !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Pics of actual mixer to come later when it's not in use making more goodies!!

This was a recipe for Honey Oatmeal Bread straight from the Kitchenaid insert handbook.  It's very good!  As with all bread recipes, it's good made by hand kneading or machine, either one :)

Tomato Tease

Baker Creek Heirloom Seeds' Blue Beauty Tomato.  Click to see catalogue!

I'm in love with amazing tomatoes.  The quirkier and more flavorful or complex the tomato, the more smitten I am.  With the advent of the black, white, striped, fluted, purple and every other non-supermarket type, I'm in tomato heaven.

We get really hot summers down here in Florida, with weird extremes.  Some years are monsoons, others are drought, and with others you can throw in freak freezes or a couple of hurricanes or two.

It seems the cherry type tomatoes do very well for us when we try them.  In fact, some have just refused to give up the ghost until simply mowed down come cooler weather...that's a survivor plant!  As our focus has been to move to the farm (first getting it set up) we've had to forgo the plantings we did here in the yard in other years.

But I have to have some tomatoes soon.  My body craves them.  And the Baker Creek Heirloom Seed catalog is no help!  I'm addicted to their pictures and descriptions and the really broad variety of traditional and rare plants from all over the world, all GMO-free and open pollinated.  I mean truly addicted.  I keep the catalogue by my bedside to pore over, pen in hand, reading EVERY description and making notes or circling the ones on my wish list.  The tomatoes always figure prominently in my perusal.  And then there are the peppers, gorgeous!  And the squashes, funky, diverse, captivating!  And the melons...oh my.  And so on.  The pictures are glossy and I end up hungry for fat little cherry tomatoes and so much else to grow, grow, grow!

The picture shown above is shamelessly nicked from their catalogue (and promptly linked right back to it) to show you the eye candy that has danced in my dreams from the MOMENT I lay eyes on it.  Which was mere days ago when I received the latest 2014 catalogue.

So tonight I went online to order THE SEEDS......And They Were SOLD OUT.  Of the Blue Beauty tomato seeds, all of them.

GAHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

head smack, head smack,  head smack

HEAD SMACK.

So I ordered the cherry tomato version, Blue Berries, FAST.

I just had to share the tomato burlesque...just had to share THE PICTURE with those with the same sickness so as not to feel bereft.  Blue Beauty, there's always next year...
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12/17 UPDATE...THEY ARE BACK IN STOCK!!!

Mystic Mud

We join with Michele's family at the blog Mystic Mud in celebrating the life and grieving the loss of their precious youngest, baby Finn.  Though it's across the miles, we feel the ties of heart that bind us to the joys and sorrows of each other, this diverse homesteading community.  I thank Michele and David for sharing this part of their lives with us...we are better for it.  I hope our love and prayers can be felt at even times like this.

Dempseys, you each are very, very loved.  There are no adequate words to express our sorrow.

Love,

Robbyn and Jack, and so many others

The Other Kind of Neighbors

And on the horizon, amidst the gunshots we hoped were target practice, there arose ten or more sets of these...

We officially have no neighbors other than one family a couple miles down the dirt road, and a few folks who are periodically stopping in to do this or that to their properties nearby, much like us, as they can.  All our real neighbors stop anytime they pass, or wave.  We catch up briefly, swap names or updates or scribble phone numbers for clearing/fill dirt/ etc work referrals.  For Florida, we have a fairly remote location.  You hear no unnatural noises unless it's an occasional semi gunning it on the highway or a tractor somewhere unspecific as-the-crow-flies. 

But then there was the weekend of Thanksgiving.  Our lazy idyllic swamp and palmetto backwater became The Four Wheel and ATV Convention Arena.  A large truck and trailer were parked cattywhompus at the head of the road.  The ten acre undeveloped property just next to our five is show above...the pic doesn't do it justice.  Off to the right on the boundary of our land was the shooting range.  And over the tops of the really wild land bounced along the topside of a huge swamp buggy, crisscrossing private lands with not a care, probably hunting wild hogs.  The ATVs were tearing up and down the roads, and all over the private lands that were unfenced.  Our property had been crisscrossed as well.

I get it.  It's rural, it's remote, it's prime for all that.

I DON'T get being passed by all these people multiple times, sometimes in a not so friendly way, without even a nod of the head or stopping to chew the fat.  The camping and RV convention that seemed to be underway next door, with big obvious tracks through our ditch and land to theirs despite their well graded entry road to theirs went on strong without a single acknowledgement of our very obvious presence.

It kind of chapped me.  It seemed pretty blatant. 

At least they know we're there now.  And IF we ever get the REAL fence up and post the trespassing signs, hopefully their gun range will be a little less cozied up to us and we won't have to worry about getting accidentally blown away.   Gunshots and whining engines are fun and fine.  Having a ton of them descending on the general area without so much as a howdy or a tip of the cap...not so friendly to me. 

And there are the big dogs.  When we have livestock out there, I'm not too happy about free roaming big dogs they brought in with them and didn't keep close by.  I've read too many accounts of the killing dogs can do when not supervised.

Jack says good fences make good neighbors.  I hope we get that (blinkin blankin) fence up soon.  I like our real neighbors, the ones who have animals in their fields, or crops or trees or are slowly clearing some space for their families.  The vote's still out about weekend people who hunt hogs on unfenced private lands (ours, and everyone else's), and tear by a dozen feet from you on the road in the middle of nowhere and don't even give a nod.

Maybe it's seasonal.  The next week, they were gone.  Till...the next holiday weekend?

Fences and Flying Shovels

 Clear blue skies with fluffy clouds.  No sinister omens in sight to warn of how steep our learning curve is when it comes to putting up barbed wire...

This past week went well in some respects and in others it was humbling and frustrating. One thing that's really important when it's just the two of us is learning to work together. My husband and I have very different work styles and abilities and teamwork skills. That is the preface for this update post :-D

Fence Not Done Right

 There are several factors that slow us down in working at the farm, the biggest one being

IGNORANCE
We're complete rookies and often have NO IDEA WHAT WE'RE DOING.  I can't repeat that enough :) Book-learning and youtube videos are indispensable, but they are not infallible and they don't replace the actual hands-on that happens.  The learning curve is steep.

DISTANCE
We had better have our act together before heading out there, because it's an hour's drive each direction and fuel costs are prohibitive, so we have to plan each trip. Sometimes we do better than others.

LABOR 
This past week we pretty much flopped. Another slow-down factor is whether Jack is up to the labor or not on any given day. Because he works some night shifts, the off days are hard "daytime" days on his body's time clock...it's like constantly switching his sleep/waking cycle complete opposite hours every few days. My schedule can be like that, too, when I work night shifts. But it's less crucial for me because I'm not doing much of the actual physical labor at the farm. His digging post holes, lifting those heavy posts, unloading the heavier items from the truck, and so on requires him to not be so jet-lagged. So often he will simply sleep an entire day in between his work days and a farm day. And I don't want to push him, no matter how anxious I am for us to have a day there getting things done. After all, this is SO THAT we can be together for the long term, not at the expense OF being together. Jack's my treasure. Got to take care of the man :)

EXPENSE.  We can't throw money at everything because we don't have it.  We have to pick and choose the highest priority expenses, to make much of little.  This equates in things going very slowly for us, pay as we go and do it ourselves.  We are unable to take advantage of a lot of labor-saving help because cash is rare and we have to do much of it ourselves or not at all. Some things we have no choice but to save for...for instance the initial clearing. And recently chainsawing down a big tree.  We don't have the tools to cut into thick unbroken palmetto, and we also paid to have the culvert dug and installed because to rent the equipment ourselves and have it delivered on site cost just as much as hiring a neighbor to do it and would have been more hassle. It took a LOT of saving...months and months.

REALITY
Other people's realities are not always ours.  This whole process up to now has been that way, but it's hard to explain to folks sometimes. Yes, it would certainly be smarter and faster and probably even better to use professionals to do the work. No, we can't afford it. And we're not whining. It's our reality. Anyway, I mentioned Jack and I  are learning to work together in new ways. Sometimes that means getting better at communicating, sometimes it means we find separate tasks one is better at than another, sometimes we do not see eye to eye, and sometimes we argue and then have to walk away.

Pine tree to left, needed to be cut down, too near power lines

THE UNEXPECTED
Unexpected jobs arise. One of those recently was tree removal. We want to keep all our trees, and this past year I've had to understand that some of the plants just had to go. Some areas just have to be cleared to be accessible. Some areas were cleared with equipment hired in (the few jobs we planned and paid for) and others have been cleared by hand. Jack's downed some small trees himself and a lot of bushes and brush.
This week a dear friend and another man came in and took down a pretty large pine tree. It was deceptively large and was a bigger job than originally thought (by me...Jack estimated it better...he won that bet). The man cutting the tree literally shimmied up the trunk with some rope and a chainsaw and took it out limb by limb by tying himself off with the rope way up high and systematically felling portions. It was a little tricky, but he made it seem easy.

The tree had to come out because it was growing too close to the electric line overhead. There was a lot of praying going on while that man chainsawed things while balanced way up high in that tree! Thankfully all went well... This is one of those times when I wish we had more cash for these projects. There are experienced people like this man who could have our fence put up in a jiffy for a fair price. He's willing, we're willing. It can't happen without the cash, though. SO...

The tree that was bigger than what it appeared

PHYSICAL LIMITATIONS AND INJURIES
Wednesday while the tree was being cut down, we began putting some barbed wire on the front corner section, the short one. It was a lesson in patience and starting over a few times. I can hammer staples and help unroll the wire and hold it. Jack does the lion's share of everything. His knee was so sore after being out there just a little while, he needed to just put it up and rest it that night, and he was in pain. This has rarely happened, but it's important not to push a potential injury. So...

Thursday was a day for him to recoup. He mostly stayed in bed and I fed him good food.

Friday we wanted to finish reinforcing the front brace posts.  
Here's what went wrong...
1. Ever had a day when you felt like a zombie for no reason? We both did. We didn't load everything we needed into the truck before setting out. We thought we had, but we hadn't. That's happened before.  Once we forgot specific tools.  Another time we forgot the 5 gallon potty and TP.  (If you're going to be out there ALL day, it comes in handy)  Sometimes  a particular tool.  It's frustrating if you take the paint but leave the paintbrushes behind, and so on.  Time for a master checklist...
2. We were both out of sorts. Not sure why.  But feeling like we still have no clue after reading and TRYING to have a clue on some particulars can contribute to frustration...
3. Jack understood what he wanted/needed to do...I did not. And we had not communicated well about the day beforehand.  It began to seem to me like we did not have enough of a plan for how to proceed with the fencing. I wanted to understand better and adjust our plans early on rather than continue doing something the wrong way if that were the case. Being ON the job sometimes is not the best time for losing the time needed to get on the same page.
4. We have a HUGE disagreement about whether to run the wire inside the perimeter posts or outside them. I vote for inside, according to all I've read and for the reason we hope to have cattle. I also noticed that spacing the wire a foot apart was probably not going to be close enough together. I had images of cows running loose or leaning against the wire and popping the staples out. Jack disagreed and gave me no real reasons why, other than his feelings on the subject. That just didn't go over well with me. If felt we should work this out now, not wait till later. With that said, I found plenty of evidence that if the fence is constructed well enough, the wire can probably be fine either side of the posts. I just disagree with Jack's lack of reasons to do it that way, especially since most of the ag fences we see in that area are run with the wire inside. THAT was the beginning, and the continuance, of our being out of sorts with each other those days. And I still feel like the wire needs to be run on the inside, but 'nuff said.
5. We looked at sizes and prices of the actual fence posts at tractor supply, and I was calculating costs. Originally we wanted to put up woven wire around the perimeter, but the barbed wire is much less expensive and would still suit our purposes for the larger livestock. So far we have 8 foot posts on the front. Jack wants a five foot fence, and I don't care if it's four feet or not at this point. After much back and forth (some of it heated some not) we're going to put in the 8 foot posts (five feet high above-ground) along the front roadway, and consider doing the sides and back with the six foot posts (four feet above ground).

Before our amateur fence wire attempts...

We did all the wrong things so far with the barbed wire. I don't like that Jack doesn't wear long sleeves or heavy enough gloves working with that stuff. Those barbs can rip through skin in no time. I reckon he'll find what works for him, but since the days are in the mid 80s and up still right now, he gets mighty hot with long sleeves. I wear them anyway, and I burn up. In retrospect, after a very polite and kind employee at Tractor Supply walked us through the fencing tools section answering a lot of questions while I jotted notes and drew diagrams in a notebook, we found out some of the things we were doing wrong.

 Friday, when we were finally out at The Fence That Wasn't, we saw that the three strands of wire we had already put up were sagging. Sagging enough that when I put my foot on one, it would just go downnnnn. Even rookies like us know that's a lousy thing. So I asked Jack to see if we could just get them tight enough before doing anything else. He used the fence stretcher, which would have worked ok if we knew how much tension to keep when cranking the handle. He got the wire to a good tension and the part grabbed in the stretching tool was supposed to be tightened, I think, by using another tool to grab and turn it till taut. It worked, initially, till we did one turn too far and then it broke (the wire). Then Jack tried to figure out how to splice another wire there, and he did, but when we released it, the wire was still too loose.

At this point, this whole procedure had taken about an hour. I think I said "we have to learn to do this the right way so we don't repeat this every time" and it was apparent we just weren't doing something right or this was going to be the longest running wire-breaking-and-repairing nightmare ever. We were too disorganized, too ignorant of just what to do, and too irritable to flex and find a better task to round out the day. A couple adult tantrums were thrown under a beautiful blue sky, and I believe also a shovel was thrown into the ditch as we "discussed" things.

So I think we realized that it would be better to regroup and write out questions, make a master list of supplies as a checklist for future trips, and to make a trip to Tractor Supply for exact prices and sizes of things (as stated above). Then we went and got tea and all you can eat fish at a local dive that was on the way home, and started THE LIST.

Then we went to Tractor Supply and spoke to The Very Nice Employee and his sidekick, who gave us these two enlightening instructions that may save our fence and our marriage (ha!) ;-)...
1. Use the "come along" tool for the initial installation of the barbed wire strands. I drew diagrams, he showed us the gadgets and how to use them, we plopped them into the cart and removed other gadgets from the cart we did not need.
2. Drawing a diagram of the corner posts, we were beginning the wire on the wrong post. The wire is wrapped on THE corner post a coupe times, all the way to THE OTHER corner post, and tightened up using the "come along" tool, NOT the fence stretcher tool. THAT was supposed to be for repairing fence breaks. Even though it seems very self-explanatory, those two little steps, because we had not been doing them or doing them the right way, are crucial and basic. SO...let's see if we can figure them out the next time.
Oh, and we bought a roll of SMOOTH WIRE for reinforcing. They were out of it before, but they had a roll this trip. And SMOOTH WIRE is.......SMOOTH.

That's all. We're still together. We still love each other. Being two stubborn people working on one stubborn fence will try us both. Better planning. We hope that's in place now. We're not going to be defeated by a few strands of barbed wire. Let's see if we can actually GET IT ONTO THE FENCE now...

See?  I'm smiling....  :-D

Just keep the shovel out of throwing distance a while longer...

"My Parents Brainwashed Me" Video

I love this video.  "My parents brainwashed me."

Happy Thanksgiving to You, With Love

I hope you're having a wonderful Thanksgiving!

For many this is a time to gather with family and friends.  For others, it's more complicated, or this season is a difficult one.  Or maybe it's a little of all of that.

Some of those dear to me have taken hard hits this year.  If you're reading this and you're one of them, you know who you are, and that we are praying for you very often.

Some folks get to be with loved ones just now, and for others it's a hard time, or a time to decide how to make the most of time alone.

I've had some of all of those before, so this season is filled with mixed feelings.  I lost some precious friends and clients in this past year's cycle, some to old age and some to illness.  My heart is heavier and it is richer.  It's easy to say that, but I'd just as soon have those dear ones back again.

There are times I remember from long ago, from childhood, from my first marriage, from days being a single mother.  What a hodge podge of memories and emotions those bring!  I feel replete with the memories of times I never knew back then would mean so much later.  I feel a sense of loss at changes that have happened through the years, too, sometimes.  Even though I'd like to grab some of those moments again to savor, I wouldn't wish to travel back again to stay.  If there is anyone out there who can truly say they don't have any regrets, I kind of wonder if they're very invested in the "examined life" at all...I've learned from my regrets and I still find it hard to always balance the different people and areas of my life correctly and meaningfully...meaning being fully in the moment and attentive to all those I love, while still able to juggle "outside" demands (job, etc) and the fact I'm so much slower physically with this knee situation.

I'm not melancholy just now, but I am both happy and sad, and very very grateful.  I've been told my dear friend, who used to be my client for the better part of the past two years and now lives with family out of state, has declined to the point hospice has been called in.  Walking up and down the aisles at the store the past few days for this and that surprised me with unexpected tears and happiness both.  So many things remind me of my loved ones recently departed, or of my grand lady who may soon join them.

I want to continue to be a better wife, mother, friend, and not miss a single second that might otherwise slip by.  A set of circumstances is keeping me from having Thanksgiving with my daughter, and I really miss her.  She is growing and maturing so fast, and I'm so proud of her.  I also want her to always feel a rich sense of home and place and sometimes I try to balance my nurturing genes with letting her call the shots...I can remember enjoying my independence at that age.

I don't "have a village"...no parents in my life, our old ones already gone, and more than a decade of my prior marriage invested in those in-laws, only to be lost to me after the divorce, something I never saw coming.  We have a very dear circle of friends about an hour away from here, and they are the family we have all made from scratch, the wonderful way God does when he brings like-minded people together as kindred spirits.  They are precious kindred spirits who love God and encourage us in Him so often, and we are so grateful.  And I will always always have the golden few from the past, my can-count-on-one-hand friends far away who have been there through thick and thin, my laughing and commisserating and sometimes crying buddies.  And my dear dear friends I know through this crazy medium of the internet, and truly love.  The internet without which I would never have met my best of all friends, my beloved Jack, to whom I've been married now for over 9 years, and grateful for every day!

For Kim...I miss you so much.  The space you filled here is not being filled by anyone else.  Your generosity is still giving, somehow, even though you're gone.  I have nothing but happiness thinking of your wit and quick humor and intelligence and how you met the real person in whomever you saw, not preoccupied with appearances.  You embraced beautiful things and you worked to make people feel loved.  Your mother is wonderful and I'm so happy to know her through  you.  I feel so very ripped off that you're gone at such a young age.  We were supposed to have so many years to see both sets of our girls grow up and see how our own stories "turned out."

For Miss Dottie...I miss you, too.  I can hear the phrases you used all the time, in all kinds of situations, and I just cackle with joy!  You are a piece of work, and you know it.  I know you had a long life and you lived it your way.  You also noticed people, remembered the names of their children and even their pets and always asked for updates.  You remembered to thank people, you raided the sales aisles, especially the candy aisles, to take candy to your favorite medical folks the more you had to go to the doctor for this and that.  You never forgot to thank anyone with a little box of candy, especially those dang bags and bags and bags of Caramel or Chocolate or Butter Rum "Nips" we toted all over creation, ha!  I miss you bossing me around as I tried to navigate your huge van into little parking spaces or cut across three lanes of traffic in rush hour.  I miss your delight in plotting new things to see or places to try (especially to eat out, you loved that).  And how you always were opinionated about particular sports figures, either loving or hating them, and knowing every gossip rag report about their private lives...ha!  I can NOT watch any golf with Tiger Woods playing without hearing your voice saying "MISS...MISS the ball!"  And you certainly made election year the most commented-on and memorable one of my experience, and I wouldn't have it any other way.  I could go on and on, but it's not the same with you gone.  I'm only glad you're out of pain, that's the only thing I'm glad about in it all.

For Miss J...I'm not ready for you to go, even though you say you are.  I can't even find the words to type why right now, because I'm not going to cry all over my keyboard.  But I did cry at Sam's club when I saw chocolate covered pretzels and remembered how you love those so much you tuck them down into the side pockets of your recliner till they pooch out like chipmunk cheeks.  Even when you didn't feel up to eating much of anything, you'd nibble chocolate and have a moment of bliss :)   I can't think of old hymns without thinking of you.  And so many other things.  I'm stopping now.  But I won't stop remembering, ever.  I miss your face and and grateful for every moment to talk by phone now that the days are numbered.  They always were, but...well anyway.

For my daughter...I love you.  You will make it through the roughest of spots because God has a special purpose for your life.  We don't get perfect lives and you've had disappointments.  That's part of life a mom can't change for her daughter even though I sure wish we could.  We've had to patch together a family that's not as big and extended as we had in the past, and we feel that sense of loss.  But we have each other, and that's more than a lot of people ever get.  We have today and hopefully a lifetime of more todays to make family through determination, loyalty, and our wonderful Father's help.  I have a wonderful husband who loves being your stepfather.  You are rare and precious and FUN :)  I would not have anyone else as my daughter but you, and I'm so glad God chose you to be mine.  I'm going to work harder so we make the most of our time, even though you're all grown up and busy and sometimes we simply have to steal some hours together.  I enjoy every one of them.  There will always be plenty of things to continue working on with ourselves and areas to improve.  Be gentle with yourself and kind with others.  When things get down, look around and see the people no one else wants to see, and you'll never be lonely.  You have all the stuff of a great friend.  I'm praying for God to surround you with firm friendships and one day a husband who is hand-picked just for you.  You know if He can do that for me, He can for you, too.  Did I mention I love you?  Psalm 139 is your psalm.

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So...I believe it's time to finish up the few lagging Thanksgiving dishes that had to wait till the last minute.   The house smells wonderful.  And that sink full of dishes?

I'm grateful for them!  They mean there was wonderful food to cook!

We did not know if we would have money to buy Thanksgiving special ingredients, but on THE day we needed it, we got just the right (modest) amount back from the mortgage company from what was left of the escrow after their paying the yearly property taxes.  God is my beloved Father, and whatever lack I might feel from wishing I had blood relatives like the Norman Rockwell pictures always show, I have no complaints in the God department.  He has always been there, always been kind, and always kept me from being drowned by circumstance.  TRULY my deliverer.

Loving God, my husband, my daughter, my sweet friends near and far, including my internet friends here (you!) and loving having a day when we remember to give thanks in a big way, even though we daily give thanks as well.

I hope your Thanksgiving is the best possible!

With much love from our household to yours,

Robbyn and Jack <3 comment-3--="">