Monday, September 10, 2012

Realization Setting In

Went back out to the land on Friday to fill my soul up with something I can only describe as God's good pleasure.  Drink in the air, surround myself with sky and buzzing insects and the flight paths of overhead birds...

I snapped as many pics as my too-old camera batteries would allow.  Grasses, beautyberries on their way out for the year, water hemlock, lush water hyacinths in the wet ditch, innumerable palmettos and pines -- some a bit weatherworn and others bright with bottlebrushes of new growth.  And the heat, as always -- so hard to escape this time of year, so you just soak it in and it in turn soaks your clothing till all is humid.  Not everyone's idea of heaven on earth, but there's something honest and vital in it all.

I think it's finally sinking in, that we can access this land anytime.  That as far as stewardship, it's "ours" (though is any land ever actually owned by anyone but God Himself?  I tend toward the native American view that we're the caretakers, never the "owners").  I have this underlying mixture of disbelief, after all this waiting, and this deep well of joy seeping slowly upward.  I think the higher it rises within me, the more I believe this is actually happening.

Even the commonest plants stop me for a better look and I give them an eager audience.  I am so burned out of the fatigues and seeming pointlessness of urban life, although I recognize there is a paradise within every place we inhabit, that is of our own making...a "bloom where you're planted" reality.  I also recognize that there is a setting for some, definitely myself, that is not in its best element until there is quiet and sky and growing things and that I thrive like a happy little weed in those surroundings.  Or, to be esoteric about it, this "is my bliss."

Blissing and blessing...I am grateful!

I'll still stop for snapshots of the plant friends I make at our new place, the farm.  I've entitled past ones "palmetto prairie postcards" because that's the terrain term for that area, and I like to get playful with photos instead of simply documenting things with consistent realism.  Who knows, maybe some past creative play will recur in this years..things such as painting again, one of my unfinished majors in college gone now long years by the wayside.  At this time, our efforts will be directed in finding a way to get TO the land/farm, so there is more waiting.  But it's a nearer sort and one in which we can feel the momentum propelling us to something less elusive than much of the work we've put into necessary goals to get us to this point.

Where do you feel yourself most alive and at peace?   I understand that there can be peace in any situation, given God's hand holding ours.  And that any place here is temporary, subject to things much bigger than our own humanity.  What simple thing greeted you and made you smile?

I hope your week is good and full of natural beauty and many simple things that touch long-cherished hopes and joys!

Robbyn :)


small farm girl said...

I understand you feeling at peace on your land. That is where I feel the most at peace myself. Sitting on my front lawn.

Granny Sue said...

Yes, I know what you mean, Robbyn. My front porch is my "peace" place, but there are others around my little space that abound in serenity and grace.

Robbyn said...

small Farm Girl and Granny Sue...isn't it nice?? :) I miss it so much every week we have to wait to return there. We are trying to save our pennies so we can take our pay-as-we-go steps faster and it means not getting to go out there as often (gasoline $$)...but how it fills up my whole being when we do!